Loving Your Mom Role ​from the Start!

I’ve been a mom now for 9 years! I still can’t believe it. Yes, I count the 9 months ​before I got to actually hold my first bundle of God-Given JOY. That is when it ALL ​started, the worry of their well being, the life decisions, the planning, the education, ​& all the things.

When I started this journey of motherhood I lived on the other side of the country ​from any family. So to say I was a little freaked out is an understatement. I didn’t ​have a clue what to do/not do with medical care, my own preparations, or how to ​really do the RIGHT things once we brought that beautiful blessing home! I asked ​my husband, “are we even qualified for this”?! They don’t actually teach you how to ​be a parent or ALL the things to do before they send you home with this completely ​dependent tiny human! But of course, they did show me how not to shake a baby ​and what that looks like before I could leave, so there’s that... Like seriously, who ​does that to a hormonal postpartum brand new mom?! I mean I get the seriousness ​of it, BUT did it have to be so graphic?! Needless to say, I cried the whole video...

Anyway, all that to say I’ve made mistakes, not known what to do, felt mom shame, ​been uneducated about things that really matter and been super “informed” and ​“taught” all the things that DIDN’T matter. With all that I’ve experienced, now my ​ultimate goal is to become a little more each day like a Proverbs 31 and Titus 2 ​Woman/Wife/Mother.

So I'm here to share with YOU some things I’ve learned, share resources with you, ​and help you figure this thing out the natural way with a little less stress and a little ​more knowledge so you can be confident in the fact that GOD MADE YOU FOR ​THIS ROLE!

We’d been married almost a year when I found out(on his 22nd birthday) we were expecting our first baby!!!

Nine months later, out popped our beautiful firstborn! We were completely unprepared. I’d read “what to expect when you’re ​expecting”... Totally still doesn’t prepare you for the reality of YOUR child, which is different from all others! I’d listened and followed ​blindly to every well meaning medical professional’s advice. Again, I was new to all this and never had reason to question the ​professionals and thought they knew best and I just didn’t... Our firstborn was strong and healthy, but as the “professionals” always do, ​they woke my baby up every 2 hours so I could feed her. This trained my baby from day 1 to wake herself up multiple times through the ​night. We didn’t sleep for more than 2 hours for the first year and a half... This doesn’t have to be you! Your baby will wake and nurse ​when they are ready, you do not need to wake them as we learned with the rest of our babies!

We found out we were expecting blessing #2, shortly after we’d moved back to our hometown less than 2 years later. Once again I did all ​the things the medical pros told me to do, still not realizing I had a choice. I went in to have another beautiful baby and that’s exactly ​what we got! But after having been in the world a short time, she stopped breathing and started having seizures. Thank the good Lord He ​gave me a wise and fast acting husband who was able to handle the situation beautifully while we waited for the team to rush in our ​room. The last thing I remember them yelling was code blue as our door shut behind them. Then it was radio silent for over an hour, when ​they finally wheeled our little pink sleeping bundle back in the room. They said, “they didn’t know what caused it and that daddy handled ​it the right way”. This continued on and off the rest of our hospital stay. Daddy stayed up the entire time we were there to make sure she ​was breathing and okay and the staff didn’t fight us when we slept(well I slept lol) with her on our chest (which generally is a no no in the ​hospital). When they sent us home we had no more answers and just prayed God would continue to protect her. This continued for the ​first 9 months of her life until it just stopped!

It wasn’t long after that when I found out I was pregnant with blessing #3 and boy was I emotionally and spiritually NOT okay! After the ​roller coaster of the last 9 months: I was spent, I was scared, and I was angry. During this season I asked God time and time again to help ​me and to change my heart, because I didn’t feel capable on any level to care for another baby. As time passed He did just that, changed ​my mindset to see His purpose and view of children, not the world’s view, read Psalm 127 to start to get an idea. By the time she was ready ​to meet the world I was ecstatic! She came out in a whirlwind of Joy, and has been ever since! It wasn’t until she was about 4 months old ​when we first questioned the medical system. Our 2nd born was due for a checkup, but was running a fever when I went in. They wanted ​to get her “up to date”. When I asked if it was safe while she was sick, they said “we do it all the time”. My mommy gut was screaming this ​doesn’t seem right, but I thought who was I to question professionals?! Within days she had issues in different areas than she’s ​experienced before; with her focus, sensitivity, eye contact, gut issues, and skin irritations. This started us on a long road of doctors and ​specialist referrals, of which no one could give us definitive answers or help. We started doing our own research based on what we DID ​KNOW and our eyes were being opened to things we had so blindly followed before.

Fast forward to 2021 when people were being condemned for not “following the masses”, at this point we knew our lack ​of questioning and educating ourselves had caused our beautiful baby’s pain and we made a decision right then and ​there to be knowledgeable on anything that involved our family, trust God, and not leave it to the “experts” to tell us ​what we needed to do. After having been told by those same “experts” our baby would probably be in diapers the rest ​of her life, we can proudly say she’s been out of diapers for 3+ years now! Thanks to God answering prayers and giving ​us wisdom and resources! We still have some struggles we are continuing to work with her through, but oh the hurtles ​she’s already cleared, by the grace of God!

Now to our 4th blessing! We decided to go the more natural route. That means I said no to most of the things the ​nurses/doctors “told us” to do, no epidural this go around, and had a midwife deliver instead of a doctor. We got so ​much push back during the appointments and again from the pediatrician after the delivery of our beautiful boy. We ​are SOOOOO thankful we educated ourselves this go around and covered ourselves with prayer. Our baby boy is ​happy, healthy, and thriving!

Fast forward to present day and we have blessing #5 on the way! We are going completely natural this go around. We ​decided we wanted a spirit-filled homebirth. Where everyone present is on the same page with the same goal in mind, ​where our first tool is prayer instead of panic. Our goal this time is to focus on health, my own and our baby’s and ​having a peaceful space. We can’t wait to see what God does this time!

All of that being said, THAT is why we are so passionate about being educated and living clean.

Yes, that was technically the short and condensed version haha, I have so many other miracles and roller coaster ​moment’s I could share, but they wouldn’t even fit on this entire website!

Even if we don’t believe the same way about ​everything, please educate yourself before you ​make a decision that could alter your life or ​someone else's.

Following blindly benefits no one...

Knowledge is Power

This first podcast shares homebirth stories and brings on ​other birth workers and some holistic medical ​professionals. I have spoken with her personally via ​video call and she is super sweet and down to earth. She ​knows both sides of pregnancy/birth: medical side and a ​more holistic natural side

This second podcast also has experience from both the ​medical side and now holistic natural side. She does a ​GREAT job on going over pros and cons of everything in ​birth and also has a fantastic series on circumcision ​(linked below). It blew my mind and is a MUST watch! If ​only more mama’s knew the truth. Here are 2 separate ​links for either apple or android users.

Android Users

Apple Users

Circumcision Series Part 1

Circumcision Series Part 2

Circumcision Series Part 3

Circumcision Series Part 4

Circumcision Biblical vs Modern

Here are 2 more birth-workers! Both are great and ​informative in preparing for birth in any capacity. I actually ​took the full Built to Birth course with Bridget and it was ​AMAZING! I reference it every pregnancy and birth haha ​Bridget Teyler - Built to Birth

A Werking Mama

Here is one thing that helped shift me and my husband’s ​mindset about marriage and children! This is video 1 in the ​series you’ll have to go to the channel for the next in the ​series, they are SO good! You’ll have to have an open heart ​and be okay with hard TRUTH.

https://childrenshealthdefense.org/

Anti-D Explained: Dr Sara Wickham (RH Negative Factor)

Kids-First Health with No Interference: Dr. Ogi Ressel

Vaccine Epidemic: Habakus & Holland

A Shot in the Dark: Coulter & Fisher

If you haven’t already decided your stance on certain or any ​medical interventions and vaccines. You should always ask ​the doctor for the inserts + it's your right. Also reference ​Children’s Health Defense (linked above) on this topic!!

3 Courses I have personally taken and were ​FANTASTIC from pregnancy thru motherhood!

Built to Birth Program

Pregnancy Birth and Beyond

Mommas Mastering Medical Emergencies at ​Home

(the views and beliefs in some of the resources ​given are not all beliefs of my own)

So you found out you’re pregnant CONGRATS on your blessing!!!!

Now don’t freak out, just breath and enjoy the excitement of this new season.

Here are some things that have truly helped me during my pregnancies and some things I’ve learned that help to make it smoother and healthier. (I cannot give ​you EVERYTHING I do or have learned but I’ll try my best to point you to the best references that can dive deeper for you.)

• Belly prop pillow, such a help when sleeping on your side! I wish I had this gem with my previous 4 pregnancies! (I call it my “belly wedge” lol this specific ​one is small and detachable to make it work for you, most others are big and bulky)
• As far as clothes go if you want to save money, dresses and leggings have been the best thing for me during pregnancy! Not only are they comfortable but ​they save us money because if I buy the right one’s originally they will work the whole pregnancy, that’s generally not the case with jeans and shorts since ​you’re expanding everywhere for 9 months lol!
• With every pregnancy I’ve dealt with nausea the entire first trimester and this is what I’ve tried and has helped! It’s been different for each one. ​Peppermint/Ginger Tea (I add honey or vanilla almond milk in them), Ginger Ale and salted crackers, Ginger Capsules, and natural mint inhaler. I have ​never personally taken medicine for my nausea. Please remember - Natural remedies before medicinal “help”, its better and safer for you and baby.
• A few things to do while pregnant to help with labor later - Eat Dates, drink Red Raspberry Leaf Tea, watch natural birth videos, imagine your dream birth, ​and focus on your health (mental, physical, and emotional).
• Get lots and lots of rest.
• Decrease swelling during pregnancy by increasing your water and electrolyte intake.
• SneakPeek is great if you want to find out the gender without using ultrasounds
• Improve YOUR health and eating habits. Make sure you are getting what you need in the vitamins and minerals area.
• Supplements/Vitamins I take - Pre-natal DHA, Beef Liver, Vitamin D, Chlorophyll
  

Last ​picture ​before we ​became ​parents

First ​picture ​as ​parents

Birth & A Baby

Imagine for a moment being in labor, laying on your back with a catheter in your spine, you can’t lift your ​own legs so the nurses do it for you, you can’t feel anything so the doctor tells you when to push, and after ​pushing when told this slimy wiggling warm mass is flopped on your chest... That was part of my first ​experience of labor. Not something I’d want to do again honestly. Did I feel the true pain of labor? NO. But ​in turn did I get the true benefits of labor either? Again NO! I didn’t feel as connected to my baby in those ​first few day’s as I should have. Having that pain numbed made me question if this was actually the baby ​I’d spent 10 months growing. I also had a 3rd degree tear because I COULDN’T feel the surges that would ​tell my body when it needed to push.

It is now the standard of “normal” to give birth while trying not to feel any of the pain, through the use of ​interventions (which on rare occasions are necessary but all have side-effects). You will get crazy looks if ​you even mention the concept of a natural birth (which I get regularly lol). God literally created a woman’s ​body to create, sustain, and give life. So even when the pains of labor begin you can be encouraged that ​every surge brings you one step closer to meeting your blessing face to face.

Once you start labor there are multiple stages to progress through. It makes labor seem more manageable ​if you are aware of where you are at in this process. I linked multiple podcasts and youtube channels to ​listen to that will help with this area as well! Don’t freakout, this is all bringing your baby to you! Laying on ​your back is not going to help baby move through the birth canal like it should, so remember MOVEMENT ​is your best friend in labor, it will help baby get into the right position for them to engage and meet the ​world.

Know your facts about V** for your baby, well before your due date. Decide what you want and do not want in ​your baby and stand your ground. Usually the “professionals” will back down if you come at them with facts, ​otherwise they WILL fear monger you into a choice you otherwise wouldn’t have made. Don’t forget that you ​can ALWAYS ask for the V** inserts and you should, especially if you are unsure.

We strongly believe in delayed cord clamping and its benefits. Here’s a natural option to help with cord care after birth. We ​also ALWAYS do immediate skin to skin first on mama through that first nursing session, then on daddy. The bonding ​needs to be with both parents if both parents are in the picture. This helps later when you need a little rest because the ​baby already has a bond with someone else not just mama.

Things that really helped during labor/birth to keep me relaxed and most comfortable was a diffuser going ​round the clock with a refreshing/relaxing essential oil blend. We had a portable speaker and kept soft praise ​and worship music playing the entire time. My husband applying counter pressure to my lower back through ​each surge/contraction. Seriously they may seem simple but they were the most helpful things!

Post-partum

Click here where I go into detail about EVERY one of the ​points on this page!

Things no one really prepares you for...

• After my first baby I had a 3rd degree tear. I was ​not prepared for how sore I’d be and for how long. ​Witch hazel sprays and icepack pads do wonders ​down there!
• How much rest I’d need... no joke, with your first ​baby just sleep when they sleep if you are tired. I ​napped everyday with my baby on my chest.
• Everyone will want to come over and see the baby.
• Do not rush the recovery time! You are NOT in a ​rush to “bounce back” as so many say. Your focus ​should be on bonding with your newest blessing ​and creating the family atmosphere you want.
• Give your body ample time to heal (at least 6 ​weeks) before you try anything too strenuous. ​You may “feel ready” but your body internally ​may still need time to heal so be patient.
• Your baby wont be able to be soothed at times and ​it may frustrate you to no end or make you feel ​helpless. Find a safe space for them in another ​room and Just. Walk. Away for a time, until you ​are feeling better or they have self soothed
• The second birth... The birth of the placenta! (I ​didn’t have a clue how that all worked my first ​time around)
  

Things actually used or needed for mama after ​birth and while healing:

• High waisted leggings/pants - helps the ​support the stomach in the few weeks after ​birth to help with the healing process.
• Depends - change out pads/icepacks inside ​throughout the day for the first week or 2 ​like you would regular underwear.
• Herbal bath to soothe your lower regions and ​relax with baby.
• Soothing perineal spray (or something with ​witch hazel or calendula)
• Nursing pads & Nursing Bras
• Electrolytes (stay hydrated)
• Homeopathy and Herbal Remedies
• Emotional Support
  

Things I actually used for my baby after birth/first few months:

You don’t need all the things, you will have better ways to spend your money then on a long list of baby ​items that will never actually be used. You’d be surprised how many of the items around your house can ​have dual purposes.

• Boppy pillow
• Muslin swaddles (use as swaddle, blanket, burp rag, or nursing cover up)
• Side snap shirts/onesies
• Footed pant/sleeper/onesies & baby mittens
• Diapers/wipes
• Petroleum free jelly
  
• Bum Cream Stick/Bum Spray/Herbal Baby Powder
  
• I shower with my babies in the beginning it’s easier to just hold them against me but if your ​uncomfortable with that, this is the support I’ve used and the baby wash,
• Backpack diaper bag,
• Suction bulb or nasal aspirator
• A convertible bed that can change with age
• Noise machine,
• Baby Carrier/Wrap
• Carseat & Carseat Cover & Stroller
  

Mind over Matter

It really is true that it’s 90% mental and 10% physical! You have to get your mind in shape for everything else to line up.

It can be helpful to watch natural births and homebirth videos - they are a good way to prepare mentally & know you too can do this!

Here are some Bible Verses I compiled to meditate on before, during, or after birth.

Here is a prayer I wrote and use for my marriage and children, you can tweak it to make it your own.

Here are Biblical affirmations I created to use before, during, or after birth. They will help to get your mind and soul in the right ​place.

With each of the 3 tools linked above you can print them out and keep them with you to reference when you need/want a ​refresher or reminder.

I also daily practice the “De-stressor breath” technique that Bridget teaches in her built to birth course. It’s helpful in all sorts of ​situations but it also prepares me physically and mentally for birth so it’s second nature to me to breathe and pray instead of ​panic.

My favorite song to remind me of the blessing children are (They also have a movie that is fantastic!)

I hope these tools help you in a natural way as you prepare for the most amazing experience and role you could ever step into!

You got this mama!!!

Things I Wish I’d Understood ​As a First Time Mom

• Pregnancy isn’t a medical emergency. It’s completely natural.
• No v** is without its toxins and problems, research everything.
• It’s okay to be outside what the world calls “normal”.
• What God says about children and parenting.
• God did not create my baby and forget something essential they needed ​inside them.
• God created my body to provide for the needs of my baby.
• My health is the health of my baby.
• Get rest when and where I can.
• Minimize what I THINK I need for my baby. They really don’t need all the ​bells and whistles.
• Baby wearing is a great way to bond and help baby/mama cope.
• You cannot over cuddle/hold a newborn.
• If you have tried all the things, it’s okay to place the baby in a safe place, ​shut the door, walk away, & let them cry while you go breathe.
• You have to live with your choices, no one else does. So listen to your mom ​gut, the Holy Spirit, know your rights, and educate yourself.
• Use the first few weeks to heal mentally/emotionally/physically, while ​bonding with your baby and finding family rhythms.
• Kids are a blessing, an inheritance, & your legacy.
• You do not have to do this alone, reach out when you need to and accept ​help when its offered. When you are struggling internally let someone ​know! (I am ALWAYS an option if you feel you don’t have anyone close to ​confide in) no one needs to suffer in silence.
• You are not alone, God can hear you, He cares, so lean into Him.
  

Me and My ​Firstborn Blessing